I want to talk about the commercial music scene in Hong Kong for a moment. Partially because I don’t know anything about the indie music scene in Hong Kong, partially because I don’t believe there is an indie music scene in Hong Kong, and partially because the one “indie” concert I went to in Hong Kong was so horrible I decided I’d rather kill myself than see another indie concert in Hong Kong. So: big concerts, then.
Hong Kong is not a good place for concerts, primarily because our venues aren’t great. There’s AsiaWorld-Expo, KITEC, the Cultural Centre, the Venetian (Macau), and that crappy place in Causeway Bay. They’re big voluminous rooms artists can never seem to fill—even when at capacity —so no matter who it is, you always get the sensation that you’re at a half-empty open mic night.
Crowd-wise, we’re not that good also. Cantopop might be different but for the international acts the crowd doesn’t commit to the mob mentality: clapping together, dancing, cheering. Sure, deep down we all know that artists only see us as dollar signs, and when they say “I’m so happy to be here in HONG KONG!” that the name of the city is replaced by every other city they’ll visit on their tour. But would it kill us to pretend a little? That’s the social contract of concerts: like a bad relationship, we only pretend to care about each other and just try to enjoy the high notes.
So to get us really going at a concert, you have to be something special. The music won’t be enough (it never is); it’s the show, the production, and the charisma of the performer. I have no doubt that Beyoncé would destroy here; I mean, she’s the Queen B. But even Kanye in KITEC couldn’t get the crowd crumping. And damn right, I wrote that writ for alliteration’s sake. That one too.
The worst concert I ever saw in Greater Hong Kong (includes Macau) was Rihanna. She seemed completely disinterested, had no outfit changes (it’s not 1968!), lip-synced pretty much everything (it appeared), and I’d be very curious to know the results of her toxicology report that night. I bet you can sleepwalk your way through a screaming crowd in Atlanta, but if you’re not 100 percent in Hong Kong, you’ll lose us to Candy Crush immediately.
That’s why enthusiasm and production matters more than the music itself. And to that point, my best concert in Greater Hong Kong was Justin Bieber. Why did I go? Probably because all my friends are 13-year-old girls. Though that’s not true, it’s less embarrassing than saying you like Justin Bieber’s music so we’ll go with that. And I don’t, except I do like that song “Baby.” It reminds me of the time I and my 13-year-old friends bought matching Justin Bieber shirts. Sorry, I don’t have enough time to explain the whole story given space constraints for the column.