The Fake Museum

The Divisional Commander is waiting for us. We breeze by the Seizures Identification Unit and enter the Intellectual Property Rights Enforcement Museum. Good to see culture and learning are taken seriously around here.

Opened on Oct 30, the Museum is intended to showcase customs enforcement methods to the unknowing public, and act as a training workshop for gumshoe officers. It is divided into an Exhibition Gallery of Infringing & Counterfeit Goods, Simulated Scenes of Copyright Infringement, and a Multimedia Lecture Zone.

“Customs officers get trained in two aspects – How to Enter a Premise, and How to Identify, Collect and Preserve Evidence,” says the Commander, a Mr. Koon Hon-chuen. This facility is for the latter, and officers are not taught raiding techniques here, he says.

What is taught however, are the three simple tenets of procuring raid evidence. Rule 1: Don’t touch anything. Rule 2: Don’t unplug anything. Rule 3: You can touch things if you’re wearing gloves.

This year, the Customs and Excise Department seized $229.9 million in pirated goods and trademark infringements. Investigations are usually undertaken when a copyright owner or gypped consumer complains, but Koon assures me the C&E always has some clue or inquiry percolating. I imagine the long arm of the law keeps some kind of intelligence on the boil or stretching on the rack till it cracks and sings like a canary. I make a mental note to investigate rack prices.

What’s in the Exhibition Gallery

Counterfeit LPs from the 60s. Our tour begins here. Well, to be precise, it began with my emailed request for an appointment (tours are only available by request). I ask the Commander why they don’t fling open the doors to the public. After all, education is a dish best served free. “We’re concerned about safety,” he replies. “This room contains $2 million in seized goods.” Seized, he adds, in real raids - genuine counterfeits, as it were.