WHEN DEPRESSION hit director Joe Ma Wai-ho last year he dealt with it the only way he knew how - he went out and made a film. The outcome is Embrace Your Shadow, starring Fiona Sit Hoi-kei and Dylan Kwok Bun-chiu. Unlike Ma's previous work, it's a heavy drama, about a tragic love affair between a gangster (Kwok) and a poor girl (Sit).
Although Ma may be known for his big-budget, light-hearted comedies, this time around he had the relative constraints of $4 million to spend on a film that will be looking for a more alternative audience. There's certainly no comic turn from Miriam Yeung Chin-wah as in previous Ma productions.
For Ma, the experience was like undergoing therapy. While the 41-year-old was making the movie, he was able to relieve the sorrow he was feeling - something he found impossible to do in front of friends and co-workers.
'People in the film cry easily,' he says. 'It's because I want to cry. Every character has a tragedy. It's about losing something and what you learn after the loss.'
Ma says Three of a Kind (starting Yeung and Michael Hui Koon-man) might have been one of the triggers for his depression. 'I shot too many movies and experimented with many genres,' he says. 'I was very tired. And Three wasn't that well-received. I felt like I tried my best, but I was defeated by time constraints.'
In October, Ma's mother suffered a stroke, but he continued to put on a brave face. 'Most of the time, I was in a state where I wanted to protect my image and couldn't cry,' he says. 'I envied those who could cry.'