RUNNING on the assumption the chief executive of the Special Administrative Region (SAR) could be someone we have never even heard of let alone expected, the best we can hope for is a dark horse we can put a face and a feedbag to. On that basis, I can come up with some very hot contenders.
It is not only John Chan Cho-chuk who can retire from government and wait in the stable for the call. As he, meantime, runs Kowloon Motor Bus - one of the few examples where the internal combustion engine has proved a regression from the horse, which can stay upright when it goes round corners - this has proved apt.
Former Secretary for Security Alistair Asprey has also suspiciously retired. Mr Asprey was never the most loved of senior officials because his job more or less preoccupied him with detaining people. Now his experience may come into its own. After 1997 we could all be detained where we stand.
Another contender could be former police officer Ayub Khan. His tenacity over 20 years in loudly decrying his dismissal from the force and sending vituperative tracts against Governors to journalists and many others unfortunate enough to be in the telephone directory actually earned him a medal. Anyone who can hurl deletable expletives at government and get decorated for it will prove a valuable man in the top chair.
A very strong dark horse pawing the ground as he waits is, of course, Dr Ronald Leung Ding-bong, chairman of the Urban Council. His flair for generating negative publicity has rapidly made him a public figure and should get him into Legco, quick sharp.
His catalogue of achievements is well known. Never before has anyone been so preoccupied with public lavatories without being arrested. He is the man who signed the delivery note for the world's biggest maladjusted stadium. He is the only person in the Urban Council who can communicate with foreigners.
Dr Leung is fascinated by the civic practices of other cities. For example, he recently studied street sweeping in Tokyo. It is rumoured that the report concludes that Japanese experience shows if you are sweeping in an east to west or north to south direction the brush action should be right to left and left to right. At the moment this is classified information because it would require a massive retraining scheme to bring Hong Kong sweepers up to standard.